In exclusive details accessed by our reporter, NBC has decided to play the footage of a local Wal-Mart store and brand it as a new reality show debuting this fall. The show, simply titled Wal-Mart, is sure to attract the attention of all Americans. It is even expected to be more popular than all other reality shows combined, as Wal-Mart is arguably the most dramatic place in the country.

We spoke to an NBC executive for more details, “Wal-Mart is everything our reality TV shows stand for and more. There are reality TV shows contestants who bust their asses working 20 hours a day, only to get totally ripped apart by judges and given 2 out of 10 points. We feel this is similar to Wal-Mart employees who get peanuts for the amount of work they do. Then, there are employees who, when caught pilfering items, are literally eliminated. Those who get away with it or rejoin the store are wild card entrants. We also thought it was similar to Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader, where the customer’s dismal abilities to calculate prices or to find items in a store (even though they have shopped there for 30 years) would be showcased. Plus, there will be the usual sleazy people making out in the warehouse who think that there are no cameras. People won’t have to be paid to create controversy, as people consistently protest Wal-Mart every other day. In any reality show, one needs to edit out almost 40-50% of the footage, as there isn’t much action. In case of Wal-Mart, we couldn’t edit out more than 10-15% of the footage for fear that we would lose exciting content. There is so much drama going on there, even at 2 AM! It’s a goldmine.”

Just like Seinfeld was a show about nothing, Wal-Mart would be a show about everything.